FREE STUFF: a serious question

Is anyone out there wearing a women’s size 24 to 26 or so? Or do you know someone who does (not a rich person, but a person of average means who will wear stretch knits and non-designer but nice clothes, like the good stuff from Penneys and the moderately priced stuff from other department stores)?

Because I have a ton of good work clothes, hardly worn, that my cousin and I have not been able to bear to part with until now . . . although we are way smaller than that now. A number of these things of mine still have the tags on them. That’s because they’re orange or orange-ish red or yellow or some other color that is completely hostile to my coloring. I got them when they didn’t look good and pretended they’d look better eventually, but I pulled all that stuff out of the closet to try on, and I can’t keep them from falling off, which is a good thing. (My shoulders are WIDE like a linebacker’s, and for years I’ve had such big ta-tas, which are FINALLY going down now that the fluid is going bye-bye on this strict restricted diet . . . that’s why I had to get the 24s instead of 22s in the first place. My cousin is tall and statuesque and really didn’t look that big at 26/28, but after she had the gastric bypass she turned into Supermodel. I’m still fat, mind, just not a circus sideshow act.)

Anyway. (ahem) Many of these items we bought and hardly wore or didn’t wear. They are pretty much classic shapes and not trendy stuff. If there’s anyone out there who could wear this stuff, I’d rather it should go to you than just getting dumped into the thrift stores and charities, as I did with everything that I purged before. I suspect that stuff doesn’t always go to the deserving, anyhow (I’m paranoid.) There’s a LOT of money represented here (sigh), and it takes up all the room in the closet, so it’s time for it to go.

I was thinking of selling it on eBay, but what a hassle. Now I’m thinking, find someone who wants it for free. I’d ask for postage and a “handling” fee to cover packing and driving to the place where we do our UPS shipping, I suppose–the shipping cost depends on your zip code. I’d toss in a stack of the paperbacks that I’ve just finished reading for research on “what sells,” too.

So . . . would that be worth it to anybody? Do you know anyone who has recently been through a house fire and might be this size or a bit smaller/larger? (Alterations are possible, though they’re a hassle.) When Mama’s house burned down, the next morning all she wanted was to change clothes and take a bath and finish reading the book I had given her, and of course her whines of “I just wanna go home” were hopeless. She had NOTHING to wear. I’m just grateful that hubby and I had bought a house the month before and could take her there to get cleaned up and put on some of my stuff that didn’t fit right and hand her the phone to start calling people. I see the people wandering around after tornadoes and such and I think, “If only I could just HAND them this stuff!!” But the TV will not yet work as a teleporter. SOmeone should get to work on that.

(In diet news: I’m wearing the Lane Bryant 16/18, which is really about a size 20 in normal stuff because they make stuff bigger in general, but I can also wear Wal-Mart White Stag XL tops, yet the pants are an issue–because my round “ball” belly is not budging yet. My legs wear a size 16 in normal pants or 18 in jeans and look like two sticks holding up a golf ball! [Though the jeans won’t zip up on the GolfBall] But of course the pants that DO fit the GolfBall have voluminous VOLUMINOUS thighs and make my legs look fat. I’ve been wearing the too-big leggings, but last weekend hubby said, “I will not go to the mall with you while you have to hold your pants up with one hand and gather the fabric from that baggy shirt in the other,” so I decided I should size down.)

It’s drizzling, and we have a wind advisory. The wind is so COLD that the wind chill is 31 right now, and it would blow Mary Poppins right back where she came from. Not going out there, with or without an umbrella.

Leave me a comment if you think the clothes might work for you. (I was inspired to do this when Anna Louise started mailing out books and CDs. Besides, I need the good karma.)


Author: shalanna

Shalanna: rhymes with "Madonna" and "I wanna," and is not a soundalike with "Hosanna" or "Sha-Na-Na." Aging hippie with long hair, husband, elderly mother, and yappy Pomeranian. I've been writing since I could hold a crayon. I started with fiction, which Mama said was "lying." “Don’t tell stories,” she would admonish, in Southern vernacular. “That's all in your imagination!” When grownups said this, they were not approving. So, shamed, I stopped telling stories for a few years--rather, I stopped letting anyone read them. I'm married to a fellow computer nerd who doesn't really like hearing about writing, but who reads sf/fantasy and understands the creative drive. I'm actually a nonconformist/hippie still wearing bluejeans and drop earrings and the Alice-in-Wonderland hair with headbands and sandals. Favorite flavor is chocolate/orange, favorite color is either Dreamsicle orange (cantaloupe) or bubble-gum pink, favorite musical is either Bye Bye Birdie, Rocky Horror, or The Producers . . . wait, I also love The Music Man. Is this getting way too specific and irrelevant yet? Obvious why I don't sell a ton of flash fiction, isn't it? To define oneself, I always say, it is good to make a list. How about a booklist? Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird Frank and Ernestine Gilbreth, Cheaper by the Dozen C.S.Lewis, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (all the Narnia books) J.R.R.Tolkien,The Hobbit/LORD OF THE RINGS trilogy Gail Godwin, The Odd Woman F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby J. D. Salinger, Catcher in the Rye (before dismissing it, actually read it) George Orwell, 1984 Kurt Vonnegut, Cat's Cradle Donna Tartt, The Secret History Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn James Allen, As A Man Thinketh Mark Winegardner, Elvis Presley Boulevard James Thurber, My Life and Hard Times The Wizard of Oz, L. Frank Baum Winnie-the-Pooh/House at Pooh Corner, A. A. Milne Peter Pan, J. M. Barrie The KJV and NIV Bible (each translation has its glories)

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